I am a single mother of three children. First born is 19 years, second born 16 years and the only girl, last born is 12 years. I have raised them all by myself. I have a job and so I am able to meet their needs.
A year ago I met a man in my life whom I feel it’s more than a friendship. He is a widower with two children who are above 20years and we are planning to move together as a husband and a wife. My worry is my children who are teenagers. I don’t know how to approach them. I fear their reaction.
I feel I need someone to love me as a husband but I am worried on the reaction of my kids. How will I tell them that we will be moving in with a man who will be their dad? Moving from my house to the man’s house and stay as a family? If you come across this lines, kindly advise.
Yours concerned mother
Have you ever experienced such a scenario? Or if it were you what could you have done? Let’s help the worried mother through the chat.
Have you ever insulted your child? Has your child suffered from name calling? Have you ever thought how this could cause a great mental harm to your child? Verbal abuse should not be taken lightly. This happens more with mothers than fathers. I believe after reading the article below , you will never do it again! You can as well watch the video below.
Daisy was a grade three child. She was a quiet girl who did her work silently. She wasn’t social and most of the time she spent all alone. Let me say that she wasn’t gifted in class work. She lived with her mother who didn’t understand her at all. Most of the time is when she scolded her calling her names like cow, dog, donkey, foolish and stupid.
There was this one name she liked calling her mostly, “Ng’ombe” meaning cow. Anytime she did something wrong, she would shout at her,” Ng’ombe!”
One day , while at school, they were asked to do a quiz which she got nothing.The teacher was so annoyed as she thought the quiz was easy for everyone in class. So she shouted at her,” Kwa nini unafanya kama ng’ombe? ” meaning, ” Why are you behaving like a cow?”
Daisy walked to her desk feeling devastated. She was afraid of becoming the laughing stock of the class. Having reached where she usually sat, she covered her face using her sweater and cried bitterly.
It was during the creative lesson one afternoon when the teacher issued the learners with plain papers. Then she told them, ” On this paper, draw anything you may think of. Make your picture as attractive as you can.”
Every learner was excited to have the lesson. They enjoyed the creative writing and after some time the teacher collected the papers for analysis.
When she was going through the work, she came across this one paper. On it, a cow with a human head was drawn! To her amazement, the paper belonged to Daisy. Before the class could leave for break, she requested Daisy to be left behind.
” Why did you draw such an animal? I haven’t seen such a creature!” she asked Daisy. Daisy looked at her and started crying. It took a long time before the teacher could convince her to talk. Finally, she was ready to let it out.
” My mother always calls me a cow anytime I do a mistake. I have never known I am one until you asked me why I was behaving like one! When you asked as to draw, I tried to imagine how I looked like in the eyes of my mother and that’s what I came out with.” she narrated.
The teacher was very sorry and remorseful. She apologized to Daisy and after some talk with her, she decided to invite the mother to come to school where they talked at length about the issue. They swallowed their pride by apologizing to Daisy and promised that it wouldn’t happen again.
This was the beginning of a new Daisy! Everything seemed to change beyond expectations. Her performance improved as her self esteem too. She became the peer leader in upper classes and participated in most of the school activities. What a good ending!
From the above we can all see what insults and verbal abuse can do to our children. Let’s all refrain from calling our children names, insulting and scolding unnecessarily. This may cause mental challenges in our children leaving them stressed. As we discipline and make them responsible , it is always good to use kind words. We should avoid damaging their self esteem as this may bring a great harm to their lives.
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This statement seems to be a bit ambiguous, having in mind that there is the second coming of Christ as per what Christians would say. Others would argue that there is heaven and hell and if you miss one, it means is a direct ticket to the other. Another group would say that this is the only life we have and we should enjoy it to the maximum. Fine, all these are subject to discussion. But according to to this young girl by the name Liznet, the other world was real. She wanted to be something different from what she is now.
One beautiful morning, she called her mother and said, ” Mum, in my next life, I want to be…..”
She was interrupted by a phone call from her mother’s cellphone. The mother answered the call that took a bit of her time. Liznet was impatient, she wanted to narrate her expectations of the next world. She requested her mother to spare her some time. The didn’t take long and after a few minutes, she was through with the call, she took a stool, walked outside and after wiping it she sat down and alerted her daughter that she was ready for the story. “Come here my dear. You can now tell me all what you want. I am……there goes the bell. Let me check whose is there.”
Opening the main gate, she was shocked to see a group of women from one of the Support Group that she was a member. They had come to visit her.
“What a surprise!..I didn’t have any idea of this. Nancy, you must be the master planner of all this!..Anyway, welcome home!” She said as she urshered them in.
Liznet was not a happy girl. Her story had been cut short by the visitors. She had to be patient until the ripe time comes to complete the story. Her anxiety couldn’t wait. She rushed to her bedroom and locked herself inside.
There was a hot chat among the women and little did they notice the absence of Liznet not until the time of leaving when the mother called out,” Liznet, Liznet where are you? Please come and say hello to visitors. They are almost leaving”
Surprisingly, she came out of her bedroom smiling. In her hands, she was holding something which she hid at her back. ” What’s that that you are hiding? Let’s have a look at it.” one of the ladies requested her.
She moved closer and displayed a beautiful picture that she had drawn. So to say, her silence in the bedroom was with a purpose.
“Yeah! This is what I want to be in the next world. Yes, the next life. No sorrow, no trouble, no hustle again in the next world!”
In the picture there was a beautiful bird that was soaring peacefully in the sky. Below it, there were beautiful trees scattered at the Savannah. The picture said it all, “In the next world, I would like to be this beautiful bird!”
Everyone in the room was shocked with the news. There was a moment of silence as the ladies gazed at one another. ” Okay, what a beautiful picture!..eh…ah…but why have you decided to be a bird?” her mother broke the silence, but what mattered to Liznet was that the message had reached home. Yes, to be a beautiful bird in the next life!….…catch up with the next part to know why Liznet chose a bird for her next world… that’s it!...what would you like to be in the next life?… kindly hit like if it is worth it and follow the story…. comment too on ways I can improve.